So I'm not happy here. I feel it it my gut. I knew I wouldn't want to stay forever and I knew this was a temporary job and I still know that I could evacuate at any time. But there are things you know and things you feel and the difference is between adult and child, day and night, the line which contains the circle, the inside versus the out.

Our our feelings and our thoughts yin and yang of each other? Is reason the balance to emotion? Is that so obvious already?

Well, I guess I haven't had my coffee yet, I'll give myself that, but then I'll also admit that even life's simplest lessons have a hard time staying fresh in my mind. I guess life would be so easy if not.

I'm very happy to have a job and to be able to take care of myself, paying my own bills, living within my means, and making up for the years where I didn't. Sometimes I wonder though if moving away from everyone I know wasn't some sort of punishment.I've always thought of Texas as a retreat from my own life - a chance to think about 5 years in New York, all those misdirected attempts at love, all those emotions rocketing me around that city at all hours of the night...

Here I am contained. I am getting a little dog and a cat so even my person is restrained. Here we reside in a little two bedroom house in the middle of a little town. Here we will stay until something is more figured out.